Happy Holidays! :)

Due to my intense addiction (maybe you know what I mean), I forgot to greet you guys a Merry, Merry Christmas ana a Prosperous Ney Year! But I'm not that ate naman, di ba? Before the year end, at least naka-greetako. :) Well, how's the holiday my dear readers, followers and co-bloggers? Ako? I had a great tim, yeah a good one. All day long I just listen to OK FM 97.1 (the coolest radio station in town), coz our television is out of its system. So, I wasn't able to watch movies which I love doinf during rest days. Anyways, 2009 will end in 2 days. Any New Year Resolutions? Ako I have, :) . Im now taking all my chances, doing the best that I can do and enjoying things this life may offer. I'll be a good girl na (I'm always naman ata), and I'll try fighting laziness by next year (at least I tried). =)

Top 10 Reasons Why 2009 is Still a Good Year after all the Downfalls..

1. Passing the Midwifery Licensure Exam last April.

2. Rainie Yang and Gail nicolas, they were one of the great inspirations I have this year till the end of time. :) The never fail making me smile..

3. I'm now on my 3rd year. Remember my post months ago that im kinda wooried if im gonna continue my schooling? Wel, I' still here. :)

4. Mike He, Kim Bum and Jerry Yan- they make me fall in love. Pretty faces,yeehh! :) Belated Happy Bday my dear Mike last Dec.28.. =)

5. Music - it relaxes me and it bring me to places I love for a while, by just listening to it. Love the songs of Rainie, though I relly can't understand the meaning. I love the melodies of her songs. =)

6. Talking about money, itsreally not a good year for us. But i'm happy we nmade it through somehow.

7. I gain friends, yeah incomparable friends. I feel so happy coz I can see and feel how much they treasured the friendship we have. Hmm, hop the never change. :)

8.I can feel love from my relatives, yap! and I love them too..

9. RAINIE YANG - she herself is making me happy this month. Its pretty obvious right? Lol. :)
I love her so much.. yeah!

10. My RAINFALL -my blog.. Yes, it brings me much joy..

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! :)

Its the year of the Tiger..

Check this One.. :)

yu ai - super cute video..a very nice song. :)

Rainie Yang.. :)

Ai Mei.. :)

• Name: 楊丞琳 (杨丞琳) / Yang Cheng Lin
• English name: Rainie Yang
• Also known as: Ah Lin / Lin Lin / Xiao Cheng Lin / Cheng Lin / Yeung Sing Lam / Lily
• Birthdate: 1984-Jun-04
• Birthplace: Taipei, Taiwan
• Profession: Actress, singer and host
• Height: 162cm
• Weight: 42kg
• Star sign: Gemini
• Chinese zodiac: Rat
• Blood type: A

She started acting when she was 14-years-old, appearing in movies and commercials in Hong Kong. At 15, she auditioned for a girl band to be launched by BMG Records called "4 in Love" and passed with flying colors. From then on, she was called "Rainie" to fit in with the weather-based named girls of the group; she was originally called Lily in the industry. She moved to Taiwan and pursued her acting career as she lived with her co-band members under one roof. She starred in various dramas starting with the mega blockbuster Meteor Garden where she played a supporting, yet pivotal role as the cute Xiao You (Hana Yori Dango’s "Yuki" Chinese counterpart). The rest is history as she proceeded on to be a much-loved leading lady by respectable men and starred in more bankable dramas. Unfortunately, in late 2002, 4 in Love had to disband. Windie and Sunnie proceeded with their studies and Cloudie pursued becoming a stewardess. Rainie was left in the E-circle. Continuing as a solo artist, she reached new heights and levels with a different job- as a host. She discovered her hosting skills with the hosting jobs she did left and right. She became a host without disrupting her acting career where she also received many projects. She continued singing by performing on the OSTs of her dramas. 2005 was a pivotal year for Rainie. Her leading TV series "Devil Beside You" (恶魔在身边) with Mike He brought her song Ai Mei absolute success. She holds the record as the first Chinese newcomer to achieve platinum status with her debut album My Intuition Ai Mei.

                                                                                                                  -from DRAMAWIKI

I was surprised upon knowing that my fave Asianovela star- Rainie Yang, also sang the OST's of her tv shows.From Devil Beside You,Why Why Love and other shows like Romantic Princess,Rainie Yang was behind it. Maybe you know now why I prefer to call myself Rainie in my past posts. =) I thought, Rain is just an actress but she's included in a band before she took an acting career. I love her song An Mei (Devil Beside You OST), that is a very good song from her first album I guess. I love their team-up (Mike He and Rainie), they are so cute together. Mike is a very handsome man (no doubt), his eyes, the way he stares at Rainie, his smiles, he's really a hottie. =) I hope the chemistry between the two continues to reality, not just in shows. I really love them together,I want to see more of them not just in Devil Beside You and Why,Why Love. Im hoping and dreaming of meeting them someday. I want to see how Mike really stares and laugh and
Rainie, if how jolly she is and to hear her angelic voice. How I wish.. =) All I can say now is that I really really love Rainie Yang and Mike He. They are giving me much happiness this holidays, though I'm troubled about my thesis. Rainie is an inspiration for me,and it seems like I now prefer to be called "Rainie". Its not bad naman ata coz our names sounds alike, right? Haha, from now on, Rainie is the name of the blogger. =)

Rain on Earth! :)

My fave pair, they are so cute together.. I love Rainie and Mike! :)

I love Rain! Rain on Earth! =)

Group 7.. :)

Makulit, maingay at masaya - that's the three words that best fit to the group. But yet, Group 11 is still the best group ever among the rest. Knowing each one of them is great. But meeting a new group is always a new challenge, with new beginnings and of course, friendship.  Being with a new group this year frightened me at first, but as time goes by, I started realizing they were as good as my former groupmates, though at some points maybe different. I may not be close to some of them, but I really enjoy the company as a group. At first I compared my new group to the former, and I saw negative points about my new group (7) and I keep missing my former group (11). But everything changes, I love the new group as much as I love the old one. And Im hoping they would still be my groupmates during the summer affiliation. But new groupings were already made, and I dont even have one of them in my new group. Well, thats life.

To Group 7 - I love the group and its really fun learning and bonding with you guys. I will miss everyone in case of separation, but all of you will always be remembered. Thank you and Merry Christmas group 7, love you all.. :)

C2 Advertisement..

 We had a party last December 15, on our last duty for this year. We are complete, oww not really pala coz Junesa wasn't there, but we have our new groupmate Kuya Bilon. We brought foods ( spaghetti, ice cream, chicken, cake, and the product being asvertised - C2 Green Tea! hahaha! :)  c2 should give us an award or free 1 month supply of their product. =) We also have gifts to give to our manito and manita. Taht was a party full of fun and surprises, and so tummy filling. Thank you for the good times groupmates, and to Universal Robina - you should thank us! Haha, sige na nga welcome na.. :)

THANK YOU JUNESA! :)

I like the gift, thanks to Junesa. Personalized talaga. I like the effort, super cretive and colorful. Thank you so much. Sayang lang coz your not with us nung party. Anyway, merry xmas! Thank You again! God bless.. :)

Ooopss: No photos yet. I'll edit this post as soon as those photos are uploaded..

Hearty heart..

He's Just in my Mind

Im not in love.

Its just that when I think of love,

he's all what I think about.

Coz everytime I think about love,

memories of him fills up my mind.

And everytime he's all in my mind,

I started realizing he's just in my mind...

...but not in my heart.

"I  ALWAYS  get  what  I  WANT"

 

 

Mang Inasal with Ate Gail..

Ate Gail Nicolas on the new Mang Inasal Commercial.. :)

The Tale Goes on...

As the music keeps playing and pictures were flashed on a big screen, she started crying without knowing what the cause was. Everyone got worried and asked the reason for her tears. And as another song plays, a friend took her to the floor, dance with her, comforting and giving her words of encouragement. At their back was another pair and she was shocked upon seeing the man's face. It was him,the man she lost,the man she loves. He was seriously staring at her, with a blunt face. And as the song continuously plays, her friend left her on the floor, giving way to the man. They switched partners. At that moment, she don't know how she would feel and react, as her hands were on his shoulders. She cant even look at him as they dance. No words came out of their mouths till the song ended. They separated across the floor without even a word, just a glance - a meaningful one. Then she realized, she'll never get over him, for nobody but him made her feel
the way she feels.

October 20 is a National Holiday?..

                  Me and two friends were on our way to the terminal, riding a bus. And upon reaching the terminal, I was shocked by a big sign posted on a tree saying, "OCTOBER 20 IS A NATIONAL HOLIDAY"; .I don't know if the ones with me notice the sign, but it really puzzled me. Roaming my eyes around, I was more amazed to see people of almost hundred in number and they were in pairs, sitting on benches. The place is filled with trees and the atmosphere was suited for lovers I guess. Its really shocking to see those things and incidence in a terminal,for what is commonly seen there are public vehicles. Upon clearing my sight, thinking that I'm hallucinating, I was deeply,deeply shocked by what Ive seen. Those in pairs were kissing, showing intimacy and as if they don't mind if someone is staring at them. Turning my back to see my friends reaction, I was again shocked to see that they were gone. And I started realizing that I'm the only one standing there, staring at those people. I was surrounded by them, I'm the only one standing at that very moment when everybody's busy doing their things on those benches. Then I looked at the sign again, and ask myself "Is October 20 really a holiday?". If yes,what is it all about?."

                Then my phone alarmed. Its already 5:20 AM and I might be late for school, so I immediately fixed myself. It was a dream,but what does it mean? October 20, what does it symbolize? I was left with hanging questions. And what I want now is to try figuring out the dream that puzzled me- the sign saying OCTOBER 20 IS A NATIONAL HOLIDAY.

A Tale of Princess Dorina.. :)

Lets suppose its November 24, 2009 today. Well whats so special about this date? Haha, read my post below to know. On that date kasi i'll be busy- last duty day in Iriga and though gusto ko mag-online, I just cant. Kukulangin tayo ng oras, 24 hours is not enough I guess. Haha :) Mabuti if extended ang November 24, additional hours pa. =) So, I decided to post this one earlier than expected.

   NOVEMBER 24, 2009

               A BIRTHDAY PRAYER

Lord, let this feast of my birth be a reminder to me of all the gifts and blessings I have received from You this day and all the days of my life. On my day of celebration, I thank you for my life and all of my blessings and ask for another year filled with Your presence in my life that I may continue to grow in your love.

               Gracious God, I thank You for enabling me to celebrate my birthday. Lord You have been good to me all these years and I thank You for all the blessings I have recieved but especially for life itself.

               Creator God, I do not know what lies ahead for me this year. Yet I know that You are holding my future in Your hand. Let my ways be pleasing to you. As You have promised, be with me, Lord. Grid me with Your strength and grace so that I can live for Your light. Enable me to draw closer to You that I may walk in your peace and be the creative and loving person that you intend for me to be. I ask this and all things in the sure and certain knowledge of your love for me and for all your people. Amen.

Happy Birthday Rain!

         The gift of life, love and friendship are the most precious gifts a man could ever have. From the time of birth, till the last breath we will receive these gifts. And we must treasure every single year of our life, coz as others say "Life is short", so live it! 

         For the past 19 years of this life, rainbows and downfalls filled my heart. But God gave me hundreds of reasons to live and enjoy life, when he gave me his life. He has given me another chance to continue the journey. The previous years (4 yrs), was indeed the time of my life, and is still on going for me to cherish. You may not understand what I mean, if you dont know the story. And I have no plan of spreading it through blogging. Wooh! Enough for that. Hey guys, I just turned a year older, but im still young, =) . Its my 19th bday, November 24. My Wish? Genuine happiness, good health, safety and success for myself &  my family. I want happiness for all of us, and I hope to start the 19th year of my life with great happiness.  =)

         Hmm about lovelife, wish ko? Sana ma-meet ko sya on the right time, coz love at the wrong time ends unhappy. Am I right? Haha. Im not yet ready to fall in love. But if somewhere down the road I meet that someone again, and if things go the way I want it to be, pwede rin. Hehe, joke. =) Happy bday to me,

-the unica hija
-the only girl among my cousins sa father side bearing the surname Patriarca
-the eldest among my girl cousins sa mother side.
That is a little glimpse at my Family background. =) yes, happy bday to me,
-the girl who sucks in Math
-the girl who loves English and music, and lastly,
-the girl who loves blogging, social networking and the likes.

Yes, happy bday to me. Haha, ulit-ulit (nag-eenjoy ako ulitin e, ^^,). And to my RAINFALL, 8months ka na din. Whew, trip lang at first when I tried blogging but look how far it goes. I love it so much! =) Happy 8months my blog and thanks sa lahat ng bumati at babati pa through Facebook, Friendster, Blogger, sms and emails. Thanks talaga guys, i-acknowledge ko na lang kayo sa next post ko. Its not yet too late to greet me, tsk! Its so early pa nga. :) Sa mga nakalimot at makakalimot, neknek nyo! Hehe joke lang, its ok.. So this would be the end of this post, thank you so much! Gracias! =)

Happy Birthday Reina Donna Mar Patriarca! :)

Rainie's Big Reveal...

yeeeeh! Its November! :) haha, sorry for over reacting.. Masaya lang ako, =). Well, whats new? Wala naman masyado, aside from pasukan na naman, ahemm somethings gonna happen. Haha. What is it? It will be a big revealation. :) sshh sa ngayon its a secret muna. Its been a while din since my last post, I stayed in the house lang the whole semestral break, ay pumunta din pala ko sa Lola ko last October 31- November 1 for the fiesta. I became the yaya of my baby cousin JR, pero di ako nagrereklamo ah coz I enjoyed it. Sobrang bait at cute na bata, I really love babies. :) Miss ko na nga sya, mejo matagal na naman bago ko un ulit makakita. Nung vacation, I prepared something to be post here but I will not post it na. Im a changed person now (owwsss), so enough of the drama as much as possible. I prepared another one next to this one, sa baba you will read it (may intro muna di ba hehe?) and sorry for those na naghintay sa continuation ng poem, wala pa eh and sorry kasi tag-lish ang post na to, IM NOT PREPARED! Haha, I just miss blogging so I posted something here though im not prepared. So lets start with my post na kahit panu prepared naman ako.hehe :)

THE SHOCKING TRUTH

Do you remember me as the girl playing boys games before? Haha, I had this boyish attitude and act when I was younger. And I guess now that Im grown up, I still have a bit of it. You may find it confusing but dont get me wrong.  =) I love action movies, I like fast cars, Im comfortable wearing loose clothing and lastly, its my simplicity that makes me different from the other girls. But this boyish aura somehow gave people a wrong impression of me. And I dont care that much actually, Im not born to please everyone. Having my family and friends is enough to keep me goin. Ahmm maybe your wondring why im talking about it. Its because I want to share something with you about SEXUALITY. In our review for the board last Feb-April, Sexuality was defined as the behavior of being a boy/girl, man/woman and is an entity subject to a lifelong dynamic change. So in our community, aside from boys and girls, we have gays, lesbians and the bisexuals. Dynamic change to which sexuality is subjected thats why may third sex maybe. So Bisexuality is said to be the attraction to both boys and girls. Lets deal on it. Falling in love and engaging in a relationship with someone opposite your sex is normal. But with the same sex? I guess I have to think of it a million times. But, hmm its still a no for me.

My dear friend I have something to tell you. I really dont like same sex relationship but since your my friend I'll accept the biting reality. Though its a shocking truth you made me see how you treasured the friendship we have. You hide it from mo for couple of monthsand I now understand. Your old enough to decide for yourself and I just wish you happiness and good luck. Im sorry for breaking a promise, PEACE sana tayo. Di na ko nagpilit coz I know you will not permit me to do so. But im really sorry, if mabasa mo man to. understanding ka naman diba? Hmm, well I remember bagay sa inyo ang song na Now by MYMP. Tama ka, dont think too much of the future, ung now ang importante. Sorry... And about gays? wag na, sakit sila sa ulo.hehe joke!

I made a poem pala when I was still in my second year but its left undone. Its hard to add some more coz parang lumilihis ung thought when I tried, but I'll post it pa din for you to read.. Try reading it with the background music from my playlist, ung  Never Gonna Let You Go. Hmm, wala lang, with additional kilig factor lang,haha! :) I'll end this post with the poem, so take care guys. Muah! =)

I thought in my life he's the melody,

to which my heart will sing in harmony.

But what we have now is just history,

for in our hearts we felt misery.

He was the first to touch my heart,

deep down my soul he left a mark.

He thought me what love is all about,

but suddenly everything seems to fell apart.

Sweet November :)

Im on my 3rd year studying Nursing as my course. And just last April I luckily passed the Midwifery Board Exam , but still facing the challenges Nursing have for me.A year or two from now, I will again experience the anxiety and at the same time excitement of taking the board exam. I wish to pass the board in a click. But since its not yet our time, I will concentrate on my subjects this 2nd semester and study harder in response to my friend's advice, "3rd year ka na, next year 4th year na, mag-tultol ka kung habu mo mabagsak at magsisi sa hudyan". So my goal this 2nd sem and onwards is having good grades, not just passing the subjects. And about my laziness, I will try my very best to fight it. :) Coz I do believe Im intelligent (ooppss sorry for telling this) , its just that im lazy thats why im having some type of mind disturbances -laugh-. And to those who believe in me, thank you. =) Lets shift to another topic, about my writing. . I do not made this blog to impress you guys about my writing (I think its not really impressive), but this is to give you a closer look of who I am. But well, I love those comments of appreciation about my blog. And to those suggesting me to shift to another course related to English or writing, I guess I reached too far to gave up nursing this time. Just like what I told some of you guys, I can do it together in one. I'll continue Nursing while enjoying writing about some stuffs. And besides, I dont see writing as a profession, its more of a hobby for me. But im open for opportunities if there are -haha-. And everyone can write, can make a blog. Its just a matter of appreciation of its art. Lets tackle another topic. I can already feel sweet November. All Saints Day and All Souls Day to start the month (sweet pala ha, -laugh-). Im not used to go to the cemetery during this days, im always indoors. I just wish my Lola to be alright up there in heaven. May God take care of her. Im also wishing my good friend a Happy, happy Birthday! :) Were growing older, and Im wishing you happiness, real happiness. :)

November 1-Yorck      

            8- Aries

                10- Ronna    

           18- Grace

          21- Aiden

                     24- myself, haha

              26- Klarisse

And another typhoon just entered the Phillipine Area of Responsibility, lets pray guys for our safety. Hope that what happened last September 26 wont happen again. Santi go out of the Phillipines, sawa na kami sa bagyo eh.Wag naman sana bagyuhin na naman mga birthday namin. Keep praying po.Be safe......

May God bless us all and protect us from any danger this typhoon may bring.. :) Take Care.. =)

Thoughts to be Shared. .

UNLEASHED

I can still feel you in my silence,

feels like our love is new and lasting.

But when reality suddenly knocks,

I realized there's no turning back.

I remember how you made me happy,

how you made me fall for the first time.

Those sweet words which may not be verbally spoken,

but shrink down to the very soul of mine.

Yes its a young sweet love,

that captured two young hearts.

Someone might say this kind of love never last,

but this is so real,

it never stops,

it never dies.

I keep on pretending I've moved on,

and tell everyone I'm glad of letting you go.

but when I'm alone the real feelings show,
how i wish,
I never let you go.


note: not finished yet
give me a week to do it. :)

im sick for few days already..
so guys, take care of yourself.
take care... :)

rocker_gal16@yahoo.com.ph

Quite a bad day, absent ako sa duty just because wala akong masakyan. :( I woke up 4am and leave before 5. Almost 1 1/2 hours ako kakahintay, na-stressed lang ako. Pero it wasn't that bad naman kasi nakapagrest na din. Ahem, I HAVE A GOOD NEWS?Haha naka-bold talaga at capitalized ano,pero with a question mark, :) . I think kasi nakabawi na ako sa pharmacology, I REALLY HOPE SO. Kaso may nakakainis na nangyayari nung day na un. Di ko muna isi-share para safe,hehe. But Im really happy. Thanks din sa mga mag-iinspire sakin at nagtitiwala na kaya ko. Sa a idol ko, si Grace CONGRATULATIONS! Pasado ka na, aasahan ko ang libre ah.. :) And to my Ate Shy congrats din xempre, proud kami sayo. Ang gagaling nyo as in. Libre ah.. =)

Nga pala, finals is not yet over, it just started. By next week Physics, Constitution and Psychiatric Nursing ang exam, WISH ME LUCK, good luck! Haha. Lalo na sa Consti,hayy. Mag-aaral pa lang ako, kaso kelan? Straight duty kami saturday (supposed to be now nga kaso unfortunately nga di ako nakasakay), then sunday, sa tuesday sa Iriga na. And monday pala we will have a tour a CamSur,sana enjoy yun..Sa Cadlan ata un (mental hospital), schoolmates wag papaiwan dun ah,haha! Goodluck sa ating finals, sana magawa natin..Papasa ako, pati tayong lahat. :)

Tee Cee..=) God Bless!

ETCETERA,.. :)

It took me several days bago nasundan ang last post ko. I've been busy for the past few days due to some exams and other school works. Patapos na din kasi ang semester na to, so Im looking forward na sa semestral break namin. I hope that the upcoming short vacation would be enough to unwind,relax and enjoy.

Hmm a bad and sad news- some of our kababayans,especially those from NCR and Region 4a suffered from a great devastation of Typhoon Ondoy. It was Sept.26 '09 when the typhoon inflicted suffering to the people of Marikina, Pasig, Bulacan,Quezon City, Cainta and the rest of the Rizal province. Lubog sa tubig baha ang Metro Manila, so the people saved theirselves by staying on their rooftops waiting to be rescued. But due to the number of people to be save and inaccessibility to certain places,medyo mabagal ang rescue. More than 200 people died,and some are still missing. But behind all of these,nakakatuwa isipin na nagtulong-tulong ang lahat in every way they can. I dont know how I can help maliban sa prayers, so I'll blog about it na lang. Maybe we can help by sending to foundations and agencies like Sagip Kapamilya our used clothing,foods,medications and money. This would be of great help to them. How? I don't know. For numbers to call in case of emergency, you may refer to superbianca.blogspot.com (bianca gonzales' blog), there is a complete list I think of #'s to call and agencies. So enough for that, sabi ko nga kanina medyo natagalan bago nasundan ung last post ko. So. I wrote something about everything that came to my mind in the past few days. In one post lang to,iba-iba ang topic kaya maghanda ka na at baka magulohan ka! Haha. =)

  WHO ARE YOU INSIDE?
 I took a quiz on Facebook just last week. This quiz ought to know who you are inside. It has series of questions for you to answer,hmm I think there was 5. And after taking the quiz, here is the result.
  "You hide the real you. You change yourself to fit in the crowd. 
You often wonder if people would like you if they knew what you really thought. Sometimes you wonder if they'd acknowledge if you went missing. You often feel like no one understands you when you do speak your mind. Your personality is constantly changing, depending on the group you are around. But nevertheless, you can always see the positive and negative attributes on each side of a conflict. Be true to yourself, those who don't like it aren't worth knowing anyways". .

Based from the result, HIDDEN daw. I was so amazed about the result coz its really true. Pero I dont want to comment na,hehe. To those who know me well, you can tell me something about the result if sakto nga ba or hindi. So friends, what can you say? :) . MY BEST FRIEND?. . I don't have a best friend, just a few close friends. The closest friends I have are still my high school friends. How about this college? Hmm,yeah they are nice and for almost 3 years of stay in the campus,I've been close to few schoolmates. But wait, My Bestfriend is the subtitle of this post, should I have to mention a name? But I dont have one,so there's nothing to mention.Haha! :) but hey guys, you can now start sending your resume here, in case you want to apply. =) There's nothing to worry about, coz I dont have qualifications, just qualification- never leave. . 


MY WORST ATTITUDE. 
I tend to push people away when I know they love me and they wont have enough courage to leave me. That's the worst attitude I think I have aside from laziness. =) Whenever I push a persnn away, medyo nagiging insensitive ako kung ano ang mararamdaman niya. So in what situations or circumstances nagagawa ko to? Let me enumerate.

a. Kapag bawal. Sorry if I pushed you away.I really didnt want to, but I dont want to keep you waiting. Mapapagod ka din lang, and I guessed it right. Sabi ko na, you'll get tired din agad. 

b. Kapag di Pwede. If hindi pwede, wag na ipilit. Be contented na lng sana sa kaya kong ibigay. Please give importance sa kung anuman ang meron,coz if not, baka one day pagising mo wala na pala. 

c. Kapag may nami-miss. When I miss a person so much,tapos hindi man lang nagpaparamdam, aawayin ko siya. I'll start a fight wìout admitting na miss ko lang siya. Kasi syempre, pag nasanay ka sa absence ng 1 tao, even without them makakaya mo na.

So thats it,if you think hindi naman ito ung worst, you can tell me. Pero I guess,ito na yun. Hindi kasi ako masyado affected kapag ginagawa ko to, lalo na if you betrayed me. Pero in the case of those enumerated sa taas,may tendency na i-push ko kayo pero wag lang sana padadala coz ayoko din naman kayo mawala. But if ever I did something wrong and your the one pushing me away, ayos lang sakin. I'll get hurt, pero hindi ko na pagpipilitan sarili ko.

  MY 19TH BIRTHDAY. . 
Malapit na b-day ko,more than a month na lang. Im a bit excited, though I know that my b-day will be just another simple day. Pero at a certain point, special pa din coz it my bday! =) haha! Why do I post about it? Hmm,wala lang,gusto ko lang. So talking about my best bday, its my 14th and 16th bday. And why? Secret! :) parang kelan lang,14 pa lang ako and now Im 18 and growing a year older pa by November. Hay,matanda na naman tayo,hehe. Hey, just a simple greeting on my bday will be enough. And importante, nakaalala. Salamat ha! =)

and also I want to greet some of my friends- BELATED HAPPY BDAY to Chin and Joana and ADVANCE naman to Angelique and Doods.. :)

HEART OF MINE . .

Playing love songs is one of the thing I used to do whenever I'm bored. Flashbacks of memories came to my mind everytime I hear songs from the past, and sometimes I cant even help myself from crying,pag may bigla kang naalala. So I want to share with you some of my favorite songs and at the same time memorable din. Some of these songs are on my playlist, so here it is. .

1. The Past by JeD Madella

"I was wrong when I hurt you, did you have to hurt me too,did you think revenge will make it better?"

2. To Love Again by U-Turn

"radios fine,it help me forget for a while. I look back and recall those days I had with you. Sometimes I need a friend just to make it through,another day spent without You"..

3. Migraine by Moonstar88

"oo nga pala,hindi nga pala tayo. Hanggang dito na lang ako,umaasa na mapasayo"..

4. I'll never Get over you getting Over me by Bellefire

"and as long as the stars shine down from the heaven,as long as the rivers run to the sea. I'll never get over you,getting over me"..

5. Angel by Tres

"is it wrong,to feel the way I do. Will I go on, with this feeling that I have. Couldn't be sure if you open up your heart for me?" . .

6.If I keep my Heart out of Sight by Nikki Gil

"if I keep on talking now, I'll only start repeating myself, and all I can say is I love you"...

7. I'll Never Let you Go by Faith Evans

"if i had one wish boy, I wish you next to me" ..

8. No Ordinary Love by MYMP

" I was alone on this journey,you came along to comfort me.and everything I want in life is right here" ..

9. Tattoed on my Mind by d'Sound

"and no melody can seem to sooth my mind,and now I cursed you for being so sweet and so kind" ..

10. I Love you Goodbye by Nina

" you need someone who'll be the one that I can never be. Who'll give you something better than the love you'll find with me" . .

HAVE A GOOD THURSDAY EVENING FELLAS! :)

ExtraorDinary. . . :)

Im lucky to met extraordinary people as I go on with my life. Though life may sometimes be hard, they seem to be my remedies, that helps me forget (though they are not aware). Even though they might not always be around, as long as I know I HAVE THEM, makes me feel alright. Maybe some of this people are out of my life due to some reasons, there memories will always remain with me and forever will be treasured. These people may not know how much I appreciate their presence, but deep inside of this heart, I really DO..

BUTC (Nursing Day)

Vanessa, Tin, Han, Pao and Ronna

Hannah Tin, Dian, Rowel, Nalyn

Diana

Roan

Ray

Lyndon

Friendship is the mutually cooperative and supportive behavior between two or more people. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, affection, and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as the exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for some, the practical execution of friendship is little more than the trust that someone will not harm them.

To those who are not included in the photos,sorry! I cant find any pix of yours - don ace, my Galilean friends and others. Not everyone in the photos naman are my close friends (group pixs). But those in solo, swerte nyo..haha! I miss my girl friends - Diana, Hannah, Nalyn, Neth.. Hope to see this girls soon! :) Im missing them so much. And to my schoolmates, I think im going to have a long vacation after sem break. Pero dont worry (for those worried, if there is) im not yet sure! But thank u 4 everything... My friends, paramdam sana minsan especially Hannah, Neth,Dian and Nalyn.Pati na din po si Rowel, paging Rowel Ostria and Don Ace Quintano.. :)

Miss u friends.. :) hope to see u soon! Hannah, dian, Neth, Nalyn, Rowel, Don Ace :) :) :) :) :) :)

Sick Nurses . .

In a run-down, suburban Bangkok hospital, young Dr. Tar (Wichan Jarujinda) and seven nurses have been running a scheme to sell dead bodies on the black market. However, one nurse, Tahwaan (Chol Wachananont), who was originally a man before having a sex change, has found out that her boyfriend, Dr. Tar, has been having an affair with her sister, Nook (Chidjun Rujiphan). Growing tired of the body-selling scam and enraged by her sister and boyfriend's betrayal, Tahwaan threatens to call the police.

However, before Tahwaan can take action, the doctor and six resident nurses at the hospital, strap Tawan to an operating table, kill her and then wrap her in a black plastic garbage bag. They then dump her in the trunk of the doctor’s car, where her corpse will be kept on dry ice until it can be sold.

All the women have their own obsessions and weaknesses. The spirit of Tahwaan uses these obsessions to torment the other six nurses. Scenes shown toward the end of the film indicate that many of these obsessions were in part encouraged by Dr. Tar, or in some in some cases, used by him to seduce some of the women. For example, Aeh (Kanya Rattanapetch) seems unhealthily attracted to material possession such as jewelry, dresses, and handbags. One brief scene shows Dr. Tar giving Aeh a handbag that was shown sewn to her head and neck earlier in such a manner that when Nook tries to undo the stitching, Aeh is left decapitated. - wikipedia

scenes from the movie

From 7-8:30 am today, I watched a movie entitled Sick Nurses. It is a Japaneses horror film, which revolves around the story of a ghost nurse having her revenge on her co-nurses who killed her. WOW! It is so horrific,very fun and good to watch though I really dont like horror films. =) I love action movies ( So close, Naked Weapon, Charlies Angels 1 and 2, and My Wife is a Gangster are my fave). But this movie, I LOVE IT! Its making me crave for more horror movies like it- laf. So now, Sick Nurses is one of my fave movies. I love everything about it, the different twists in the story, the horrific scenes,and the characters, and I really love the revelations at the last part. The pretty ghost nurse is a guy! Yes,he's a guy who had plastic surgery (sex change din maybe,haha) and she fell in love with the doctor. But sadly the doctor love Nook (her bestfriend, also her younger sister) and Nook is already pregnant with the doctors baby. She was so hurt, ikaw ba naman lokohin ng taong mahal mo, at pati ba nmn kapatid mo.. Hay.. She also found out about an illegal business in the hospital, so the doctor and nurses killed her. Nook stabbed her in the chest, so mean! Before she died, she touched Nook's belly ( maybe that's the reason why at the end, Nook gave birth to the ghost,haha..Hmm, just read he review above if nakakalito kwento ko, or better watch it!

That's all about today..

1. 6:00 am, I'm already awake, texting and thinking of what to do.

2 .7-8:30am I watched Sick Nurses.

3. 10:30 is our time schedule for Phil.Constitution.I arrive late.

4. 1-3:00 pm, I spent my time doing nothing in the Speech Lab while my classmates are playing Solitaire..

5. the whole day? hmm, its okey..Everything went right naman. Sick nurse and Blogging completed my day. Im just hoping that those horrific pix above wont give me nightmares, ( ung readers na lang,haha joke).

Have a horrific Friday evening..

God Bless! =)

Hear my Story. .

Why am I this weak?

I cant speak out, I cant tell anyone how I feel and I keep drowning myself in my own tears. Am I really destined to be one of those people living a miserable and unhappy life? I think its not bad to admit to myself that I need somebody. Someone who can help me get through this lonesome life.. Someone I can speak to, someone who can understand, someone who is willing to listen, and who can make me smile even for a while.. Do you know how it feels, when you want to say something , but when you told someone about that something, i ts as if you don't say anything? Do you know how it feels, kapag may gusto ka sabihin but you don't have enough courage to say it? Pero once nag-try ka to tell it,as if the one your talking to is mute and deaf? And when you just keep silent, dtaying in that four corners of your room, they will tell you "SPEAK OUT", how can we understand you? -January 30,2009

This was written last January 30,2009 , in a small piece of paper when I had an argument with my mom.I m not the type of person who used to express my emotions through words, so that night I express it through writing. That were the exact words written there, and I don't know why I posted it here on my blog- for I know its something really personal.Being the only girl in the family, give me so much benefits, but at the same time a big responsibility. I think the main issue here is - TRUST. They dont trust me enough to believe in what Im saying and to do what I want to do. They always see my faults and never stop nagging at me, till thir words sink in. I always follow their commands and advices, but yet I dont get their full trust. At an early age, I was tld not to commit or engage in a relationship (boy-girl), till I finish college. I fell in love before but I didn't commit in order for me not to disappoint them. But always the same thing, I think they don't trust me when I tell them I don't have a boyfriend and never had one before.. They get irritated and curious whenever they see me browsing my phone for hours or talking to someone in the phone. YES they love me,...but is it really their way of showing or letting me feel it? I love my mom so much, that's why though she keeps on telling me things that she repeatedly told me before, I don't answer back. I just listen though it really hurts that you cant even defend yourself from those things they keep on insisting. Maybe mothers are really like that, the difference maybe is on the child's reaction or on how he or she will cope up with it. I'm not a good daughter, but I'm trying to be one. I'm obedient but not yet fully trusted, and lazy that's why I'm hated.

Sorry if I have been bad, 'coz maybe as the eldest I should act maturely. Sorry for all the foolish things I've done, but please do understand. Sorry.

How thoughtless I had sometimes been I hurt you so badly But now I feel the pain I talked to you as if I knew just everything Maybe I didn't lose But I know I didn't win..

How careless I had sometimes been I gave you the heartache But I felt the pain I wanted to tell you How much I love you so I know I'd been careless I forgot to let you know.

Sorry, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you You know I got hurt too Sorry, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to break your heart Please let me make a brand new start.

How crazy I had sometimes been I hurt you so badly But now I feel the pain Next time I'll know better I'll have more time for you I'll listen to your heart Just like you asked me to..

Sorry, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you You know I got hurt too Sorry, I'm so sorry Forgive my many faults And the foolish things I've done I was so insensitive And I didn't understand..

I ♥ RAINFALL

"All day,staring at the ceiling making friends with shadows on my wall. All night hearing voices telling me,that I should get some sleep because tomorrow might be good for something. Hold on, feeling like im headed for a breakdown. But I don't know why...

Im not crazy im just a little UNWELL". . . -mATCHBOX 20

Failure is a part of human life,so true. There are times when we feel so much joy, and to balance it (maybe thats how we can call it), we also go through pain. In this post, please allow me to express everything that I feel and felt for the past years. I hope that through writing, it would help decrease the heaviness im feeling.

Have you experience controlling yourself not to cry though the tears were already falling from your eyes? Ayaw mo man umiyak, and pretending to be all right and strong,but when your filled with sadness, you can't really control yourself not to cry. Just last week I felt it again. It really hurts to know that you failed again and again. Do you know that the most hurtful failure I have, was not being qualified to the University I want. Maybe for some, its a non-sense thing but it means a lot to me. Not being qualified means being far and away from my family and friends. In my first year in the campus I'm in right now, there's always a thought of transferring or shifting to another course. But it didn't came to action and reality so I spent my 2nd year in the same school. It was in my 2nd year when I felt one of the worst feeling I had, the sadness of being alone. At first I see it as something really negative, but as I go on I look at it as a challenge and I think I succeeded, I conquered all the fears and was able to do everything the way I want it to be by myself. I thought those days were over, pero hindi pa pala. Im hurting,it really hurts as if im stabbed in the chest and my heart and respiration seems to failed. This emotions are getting worst and never leaves me. Its the thing that makes us human, the presence of those things. And how sad that in this journey of misery, no one is with me.

I'm still alone, and it hurts to admit it. It also hurts knowing your friends don't even bother to text you to know how your doing, and the fact that they don't even remember you. This is why I'm really thankful for having Grace and Chin, because though were not the type who goes out together or not even got the chance to see each other often, they never fail to remember.

Chin + Grace

Maybe they don't know how much I appreciate their presence in my life, but guys these 2 girls - I consider them as a gift .And actually, meron pang humahabol sa list but I don't want to mention her name. The friendship between us had just started, and I dont know if what she's showing me is real. The way we started the friendship, was also the same way I had it with Grace and Chin. Pero she's really nice din, and I think naman she's real. So para sa kanila, thank you so much. Inaaway ko man kayo minsan, eh kasi inaaway nyo din ako. =) Sorry if minsan I fail to keep in touch, pero alam nyo naman how busy I am.. Hmm, wait I think kung san-san na napadpad usapan. Well, lets go on with something good para happy. Last July 28, we had our capping and oath taking at St.John Church. It wasn't a super happy feeling, but it feels good. And knowing that my family is happy (i can feel na masaya kami ngayon), makes me feel so blessed despite the sadness im feeling. I just noticed, that when Im doing good in school, emotionally im not ok. But this time, my failures in school is the one bringing me pain while for my family,im really happy. Hindi ba pwede magsama sila? I do good in school and at the same time emotionally stable ako? Pwede naman ata diba? Well,sabi ko nga sa Tadpole Story "Happiness is a choice". I think i'll just stick to that,kasalanan ko naman. Donna,Donna its time to make a difference. Kahit weak ako, im a fighter so if this negative emotions think they can kill me, sorry pero hindi. Im gonna kill you,to meet happiness tomorrow. Kaya ko to, I know I can. Nakakatawa naman ang post na to, parang walang patutungohan. =) Im not prepared kasi for this,kung ano maisip ko,directly encoded na. :) I love you RAINFALL! Thank you kasi I came up with a blog na katulad mo, dati I write everything at the back of my notebooks at least ngayon,organized na sya. It helps me a lot, kaya thank you to my bestfriend- rainfall. It may always rain, but after it,there will always be a rainbow. Speaking about rainbow, exactly 4:30 pm today, I saw a rainbow. I wish it is a sign of good luck from the above, meaning konting tiis pa and my rainbow will show up. :) And im excited to meet happiness by the time I reach the rainbow and leave all my downfalls behind. To my sweetest downfall, thank you for the memories and for teaching me how to love.. To happiness, I hope to see you soon, hintay ka lang kasi there's a fight pa going on samin ni Sadness..

Goodbye sadness, welcome happiness! :)

+ I will be HAPPY :) i LOVE my Rainfall. . :)

downfalls.. :(

I think im now facing again a sad, miserable life. :( Di ko na maintindihan ang nararamdaman ko. Do u know how it feels when ur controlling urself not to cry, kahit na nafi-feel mo na babagsak na sys sobrang pigil ka pa din? ang sakit at bigat sa pakiramdam.. Ayoko n umiyak,palagi na lang ganito eh.. Are this misty eyes really meant to cry? Im so down, for whay reason? im not ready yet to share about it. wala nga sana kong plano mag-post now, this is such a dumb post! Pag ok na ko, I will just erase this.. But now gusto ko lang sabihin sa mga nagbabasa dito about it. im finding it hard kasi to show and express what I really feel, so thanks sa blog na to kasi nailalabas ko lahat.. If ur curious about it,well secret na muna. i will discuss about it in my next post maybe. since nasabi ko naman at the very beginning that this blog was made to tell and express my emotions freely and discuss about my rainbows and downfalls. Ung mga dati kong post,mostly rainbows right? my next post will be about my downfalls. mejo bc lang kasi may nga midterm exams pa pero i will let u know about it as soon as i can..sa ngaun,secret na muna. sa may alam nito at nag-aadvice salamat. take care guys and sorry for this post.

Thank u din for visiting.. God bless po..